Spring Remodel

Spring quarter starts tomorrow, but let's be honest, I'm not thinking about English 310.  I'm thinking about all the wonderful adventures that spring time will bring!  So instead of sharpening my pencils and buying a notebook the day before classes start, I went to Home Depot and bought some wood and did a slight remodel to my trusty wheels.

Introducing...

my new sleeping platform!

Don't mind the dirtiness of the car people, I just got back from the snow!  Ta da!
Room to sleep and room to store things.

Notice the poop shovel in the seat-back pocket and the Urban Climber in the other side.  So prepared.

An awesome non-permanent modification to my car.  Yippie!

Bishop Bouldering

Although I tend to think of myself as a rather independent person, I was still fairly hesitant about embarking on a solo weekend adventure to Bishop.  Would I be too scared to climb without spotters?  Too shy to make new friends?  Could I motivate myself to climb alone?

My fears turned out to be unfounded.

We received 32” of snow between Thursday and Friday morning so I decided it was necessary to take a few ski runs, and after doing so I jumped in the car and headed towards Bishop.  I sang loudly in the car and watched the beautiful scenery pass by as I cruised down the surprisingly dry roads on 395. 

Not related to climbing in Bishop, but a picture from the snowy portion of my Spring Break 

I arrived in Bishop around 4:30 and decided to stop at the Happy Boulders for a bit of climbing before it got dark.  I warmed up on some of my favorite slab climbs and then jumped on a cool V5 that I had attempted a few times on a previous trip.  The climb is low to the ground, traverses a lip, and finishes with a very difficult mantle (mantles are one of my biggest weaknesses in climbing).

After a few tries, I was at the end of the lip, poised for the mantle!  I bumped my hands around, adjusted my heel hook and rocked over and partially onto the boulder.  I was so close!  I was also so stuck.  At this point in time, I would normally jump off the boulder.  But instead, I felt something I have never experienced before in my bouldering.  I was thinking!  In my head I heard myself say, “don’t let go, take a deep breath.”  So I didn’t let go, and I breathed.  “Finish this.”  I awkwardly flung my feet around and switched from a right heel hook to a left and did a funky beached whale movement and suddenly I was standing on top of the boulder!

I did it!  I used my head and my willpower and I didn’t give up and I sent the problem.  I was psyched!  I went on to flash a super cool V3 called Slap Happy and enjoyed it so much that I repeated it right after finishing it.  The recent time change meant it was light enough to climb until just after 7.  What a great day!  I went to sleep happy and psyched for the next day of climbing.

Some crazy cloud action going on at the Buttermilks

 Yesterday, I woke up and decided to head to the Sads.  I arrived at the parking lot to find that it was EMPTY!  Quite a contrast from the last time I was there where there was no space to park.  I enjoyed the solitude for about an hour before one more person showed up.  It was crazy!  So quiet and peaceful.  I climbed around and worked on Erotic Terrorist V6.  I feel like I can definitely send this climb but the boulder right behind the line causes you to dab almost every time you get on it.  As the day went on more people showed up and the Ice Caves became crowded. 

Time to head to the Buttermilks to see if they were dry!  The forecast had been saying rain and snow for days and it was supposed to rain while I was there but it turned out to be nothing but blue, sunny skies.  The Milks were dry and I met up with a friend, Mike, and one of his friends and we jumped on the Roadside Highball V3.  I watched Mike do it and decided to give it a shot.  Soon I was up quite high and decided I definitely didn’t want to fall from this point.  I was scared for a minute, but pulled myself together and ended up flashing the climb.  I was so psyched!  It is always a huge victory for me when I can overcome my mental blocks while climbing. 

Mike on Roadside Highball V3

After that we tried a few more things and as the temperatures dropped, I decided that rather than camping and climbing a bit more in the morning, I would just drive back to SLO.  I loaded up my tired puppies and motored on home, not stopping once during the 6-hour drive, somehow using only one tank of gas.    

So there we have it.  I went skiing for spring break and enjoyed every minute of riding in fresh powder every day (122” was the storm total for the week!)  But most importantly, I went CLIMBING.  And I loved it.  

(Note: sorry for the lack of pictures!  I was intending to make a really cool video but then my video camera stopped working)

Lost

There’s plenty of trouble to be had when you define yourself by one thing.  For me, that thing is climbing.  When people ask, “what do you do?” or “what have you been up to?”  my answer is always climbing.  Climbing trip this, climbing trip that, this boulder, that crack, this sport route, that project.   

But lately, that hasn’t been true.  I have not been climbing.  Not in the gym, not outside, not on buildings, not up trees.  The last time I went climbing was in Bishop.  Yes, remember that, way back in January? 

[Disclaimer: ok I’ve done two competitions in the past month for the Collegiate Climbing Series, but I’ll get back to that in another post.  And I went climbing (inside) yesterday.  But other than that… none]

So now when people ask me what I’ve been up to, I don’t know what to say.  Actually, people don’t even ask me that.  They cut straight to the chase.  “Been climbing anywhere cool lately?”  “You must be crushing, right?” 

…no

I feel lost.  What is it that I do?  I try to think when people ask what’s going on and I really can’t come up with much.  Well, there’s school but I don’t put in too much time there.  I ride my bike, but it’s been windy lately so I haven’t been on it too much.  I play with my dogs.  Eat, sleep?

Help!

Who am I?!

Who do I want to be?

I am a climber!  Or am I?

I want to be a climber!  I think.  I am trying to figure out if it has been a conscious choice not to climb or if has just somehow happened.  I know why I don’t climb in the local gym, I am just not motivated there.  But why haven’t I been on trips?  Why hasn’t every fiber in my being been craving the adventurous lifestyle that I used to embrace?  Why haven’t all my resources been funneled into making climbing happen?

Here are some theories:

1. I am burnt out

2. The weather

3. School schedule

4. Something is wrong with me!

If I was in Thailand, I'd probably be psyched

I am still interested in climbing.  I still go on Dead Point and the Bishop Bouldering Blog way too many times a day.  I daydream about long trips to the Red River Gorge or many of the climbing destinations I have yet to explore.  I ponder myself placing gear on fun new routes.  But yet, here I sit in my bed, with a final exam in Marketing looming just 10 hours away, with no studying under my belt, thinking about why I am not climbing.

Bouldering in Bishop.  Definitely better than studying.

I think as climbers we do sometimes wonder, why do we do this?  But in the end the conclusion is always the same- because its rad, it’s beautiful, it makes me happy; it is liberating and detoxifying and pure and perfect.  It really is all those things, so I can’t fathom why I am not out climbing every second of every day. 

Clearly, I am not motivated by grades in my climbing as I have been on an ever stretching plateau for what seems like years.  I think that I have chosen to accept this though, as most people that I climb with will attest to the fact that I don’t actually try very hard (as in I don’t train, and I giggle way too much).

Very dirty. Very happy. Lovin' life.

I think a huge motivating factor for me is the people who I climb with.  But recently one of my really strong and inspiring climbing partners threw me for an unexpected loop that made me look at climbing in a really strange way for a few days.  And on top of that, I miss Tim so much it hurts!  Tim and climbing were always synonymous for me so that connotation is always present when I climb.

Getting motivated.  Send train on Molly with Alex

So, where am I going with all this?  I have no idea.  That’s the point.  I’m lost.  And I really do sincerely apologize for this depressing post since I am usually a very, very happy person. 

I think I need to decide something about climbing.  What that is, I don’t know.  All I know is that spring break is coming up and every person I know is going climbing.  Except me.  I am going to go skiing.  This is just ludicrous…

Last spring break I went to Red Rocks and the Creek

I want to be a climber.  I want that to be my definition.  I want to go back to the Fall and Summer when all I did was climb.  But for now, what do I do?  Should I make a commitment to train hard, and try hard, and get better?  Should I take it as it comes and go on the sporadic, low-key climbing trip?  Or should I take a break?  Like a real break where I find myself a new definition for a while? (I’d like to think that the answer to that last one is NO!)  I think I just need to get on routes.  Maybe if I didn’t boulder for a while and did some routes… 

Placing gear would likely solve all my problems

I just don’t know. 

And speaking of things that I don’t know… I don’t know anything about Marketing so I should probably stop babbling and start studying.  I'm sure that in the morning it will all feel ok again.